As I get older, my birthdays seem to speak a little louder. How is it for you? Do you notice the annual movements of your heart inviting you to greater awareness of what it means to be alive?
I have to confess, the meaning of life has been a topic of reflection for most of my days walking upon this earth. Yesterday, though, I was floating instead of walking. I found myself drawn to hidden shadows along Lake Beseck, where the dark water exposed unknown depths not easily seen in the sunlit center of the lake. Tree boughs and water’s edge come together to form a place of respite, a sacred space in the midst of a summer day. The willow’s leaves whisper as I paddle under her long, thin branches. Yes, it was a place of relief from the heat, but it was more than that. Quiet is speaking here, and I am listening.
For so many years, I have been looking backward at the puzzle pieces of my life. I have most of the edge-pieces and have filled in much of the scene. I’ve spent long hours, years really, searching for a few lost pieces. Some relationships and moments help me retrieve those missing fragments of my life, it’s as if I get a second, third and fourth chance to learn the lessons of loss, shame, abandonment, anxiety or fear. Each time is another opportunity to accept my limitations, embrace my gifts and open my heart to Love. Each time, I step into the Holy and experience the mystery of my humanness. Through God’s grace, I sometimes see the preciousness within. As Paula D’Arcy said,
“God comes to you disguised as your life.”
Other people float past my chapel on the lake, but I am still listening to nature’s voice. “Return,” the willow’s whisper touches my heart. “Relax,” the insects sing out at day’s end. “Remember,” reverberates through the light’s reflection, travels across the water and laps up onto my feet. I am one day older, steeped in the Mystery, and grateful for the fullness of life.
With affection, Lisa